Found out the problem to my "everything"

This time I'm gonna work hard and change everything. & by the grace of God I can do it!

Recently this line had been appearing again and again. "as you walk thru the fire, you will be refined..." I believe in this, and I know if I still feel tt I am being put in the fire, it means I am not "pure" enough to be taken out of it. Yeah.

Went for a steambath at my old childhood place w mum and dad. Enjoyed tt kind of solitude where I get to sit alone, thinking of nothing, just enjoying myself and pampering myself. Life shld be like this. No more stressing and keeping myself from enjoyment. Everyone deserves a break at times! So every forenight, mum's heading there and I'm gonna follow. Hahaha. Gonna enjoy life but it's a different kind of enjoyment.

Being happy at all the changes yet getting refined every moment. I am so thankful and grateful now. This life I have is not my own.

He's the focus of my love ^^