Just as this boy was reflecting on his life, he turned back his life to one year ago when he entered into mild depression days. He remembered at that point of time, he decided to let everyone out of his life and shut himself away from people. After a while, he chose to open up to a friend, got better but yet he went back to self-pitying again. He continued his busy yet 'lonely' life. He felt an emptiness and he prayed and prayed again for someone, or an angel or a friend to come to talk to him, to befriend him. He wanted to change yet at the same time, he kept reminding himself of times he was disappointed by people, that even when friends wanted to come closer and "enter" his life, he never opened up. He was disappointed once again and he went back to "self-depression" days again. He cried and cried and cried, asking God, "Where were You when i need You....", but he never realised, he had turned down the prayer answers when God was answering them.
Time will continue ticking irregardless how we are feeling. Time do shows everything but if we don't make any choices, we wont see anything happening. Choices made shows us who we really are.
Sudden reminder to myself, "Who we are in one year from down is determined by the thoughts we allow in our head and who we allow in our lives one year to come." We have the choice to allow who we want to become. We choose the thoughts that should stay in our head. We choose the friends we want to be in our life. & we cannot go around blaming people for who we have become, JUST BECAUSE we didn't make a choice to accept or to make effort to change our situation.
Ultimately all of us have a choice to make us become the person we want to.
& sometimes some things means so much to some people.
Was watching X-Factor on Youtube (and its really woohoo) and to win that show or to stay in the game is their life. But all of them know, to stay in the game, they have to pay a price, to practise their vocals, their stage presence and it means hard work. They can pray hard to win, but if they don't put in any effort to practise, all will boil down to nothing. Faith without works is dead.
What we really want shows who we really are.
But still... I pray my choice is His choice. :)