All for Love

Oh how many times have I broken Your heart
But still You forgive
If only I ask
And how many times have You heard me pray
Draw near to me
Everything I need is You
My beginning, my forever
Everything I need is You

In the beginning of this year, while praying for some stuff, i told God to show me a verse. I flipped, i turned to the verse where by they are talking about the new wineskin and old wineskin. I didnt understand, so i move on with this year. Then this week, While Jodie was sharing word for everyone, she told me, new wineskin, He wants to give me new wineskin. It's a season of change.

& Pst Phil shared ytd, the best wine is usually left for the last... & i had a rhema on it.. To think about it, from the starting of the year, He is alrdy pushing new wine to me, but i was still remaining and holding to my old wineskin. Even though i had this revelation of, having drinking old wine, i won't immediately like new wine, so i should change and step out of comfort, BUT i didnt act on this revelation, and still dare to write it big big on my post it. To think about it, i can just laugh at myself.

If new wine is gonna be given again and again at different points of my life, my wineskin have to be changed regularly, and this point, wineskin is my mindset. However, not forgetting my ancient landmarks, but adding on, combining it, to have the best wine in the end.

I want the best wine, and the wine usually signifies joy.
The thing about studying the word, gives you more and more meaning to discover...
The new wineskin to contain, both the old and the new so it wont break.

All for love...
& finally i understand aft half year is gonna pass...
L7 muso, i am stepping out in my new wineskin.
But not with my own understanding anymore, but really be so so so led.

L7 is gonna change my life, just like how Inspire Stronger changed me...

pls ignore the fact im skinnier there!

Heart must be right whenever one stands on the stage.
A heart wanting to just to serve and just to be use by the only One.
Always thankful for the chance, to be able to stand up there for various KEL zone events, just to be used to serve in the area of music. Not because i like the stage, to be honest(not lying), my first performance on stage w BAND, i cried.. so i dont really like the stage actually.

& really, humilty is important if you want to stand up there. I am really "pei fu" by all the worship leaders like Bro Poh, Annabel, Ally. They are so awesome and humble..

& really after listening to them on Cityradio all these weeks, i am really really blessed.
God, Use us this L7!

Long post, but tata!

hinthint

credit: tumblr

God is giving me a hint to really focus on my project...
cause it's funny how i can't sign in Msn and go other blogs except for Twitter and this blogger site.

Thus i shall continue to my FYP and BV. It's my turn to contribute something!
God is really so amazing....

Started the day with almost wanting to pon class cause i thought i woke up late but in fact, i woke up 1hr earlier. Went bus stop, met Deanna!! woohooo.

Let me tell you a joke.
So today i was walking home from the bus stop, i saw my dad at his van, he got up his seat, he didnt see me at the back. I hold my hand like a gun and pointed at him from the back, and said "qiang jie! (robbery in chinese)" and he did the "wanna fight back" cute yet shocked look. At that moment i laughed and he wanted to scold me. K my fault, but it was so funny that i was laughing in the lift myself and told Kaka when i got home.

Glad to spend time with Mum and Bro today!
Drank BBT at Toa Payoh, cut my split ends away and neglected my projects for 3 hours. Now it's time to continue!

I am glad to have such a funny family. Like no one will know the way we work and love one another...
Im amazed... :D

down w tweeeter

Freedom of speech... But yet controlled.
In every word i speak, i wanna be edifying.

My twitter is getting a little quieter, like compared to last year or so...
it's better though... like im lazy to check twitter. but yeah. maybe unfollow ppl? nah dont like it.

k im tired now.
just realise my last 2 posts actually contradicted each other. hahaha.

Had a great time of strengthening w dearest Friend ytd. With Love, i can do all things. Love motivates.. Love changes everything. Really blessed to be in Muso actually, the place where i can touch God. New season, a different one though, not of expanding of capacity, but really the attitude whelm. It's a different season, and i pray i would be able to recognise it. Lead me fof all i am doing is not for me.

Colours of the wind

It's not difficult.
Just the mindset.

Somehow this picture above describe how i feel.
Try to analyse it and maybe you will know.

But so glad today, i told part of it to Jieying, always something whenever i talk to Jieying. I might be the most problematic person in the cg.. lol..

Love motivates...

I really think it became part of me to stay optimistic about stuff, well poly taught me this. Even if things is argh ahh ehhh ahhhhh, i can choose to stay ;) :p :) :D weeee about it. Well.

Off point actually. I find it funny that poly people dk tt i was loud and only during camp, they were like, omg, xy can actually shout so loud. Okay thia camp i earn myself a reputation of "siao kao" crazy girl. But it did contribute to the hype level, so its good.
Wonder why im talking bout camp right, cuz i just had my debrief on camp. I know i did some stuff wrong, but hahah i will learn.

Life's like this. We do, we reflect on wrong parts, dont be dismay, we improve. This makes life more interesting dont you agree?

But 1 thing i really didnt expect myself to do this poly life.. To participate in stuff like this, from someone who only want to have a no life poly social life, to someone who decided to jpin the HR committee and pass 2 interviews successfully and in HR chapter.

Thinking back, God is really good. He gave me this chance and xy make full use of it.. For the last few months!!! Alison shared, as long as you dare to take a step of faith, God will show up! Really blessed by what she shared on city radio ytd...

More to think bout... (:

pretty pretty please, please don't ever ever say, you're less than perfect, cause you are to me

Ended DHRMP first ever camp. It is really good to be honest. and i guess people who dk me really think i was crazy, but oh well. That's what people know me for.. Good side and bad side i guess. Had been like doing post-camp stuff today, all the facebook things, posting pics, videos. I'm doing my communication job well! :D Good job. i deserve my cca points now!

Having this really really weird feeling, and i think if there's a place to just let it out, it would be really nice. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. okay done. This is one of the "xinying" days where she stuck in this kind of ahhhhhhh feeling.

Song for the day:
"Lazy", Because i dont feel like doing anything, i just want to lay in my bed.

Having alot of contradicting thoughts today, which is not very good. Like you know that you actually thinking it's wrong, but you tend to continue with the wrong things.

Well must be because of my dream again. Can someone please tell me why my dreams are so weird? WHYYYYY. It's a good dream yet it's bad. gosh...

Oh well Monday ming tian.
NEW WEEK, NEW THINGS.

XOXO XINYING

thank you

Heeeee i recovered from my muscle tear on my left foot. Doc said it was because i walked too much, but walk too much also not good? nooooooooo like tt i will never lose weight. anw not main point!
I RECOVERED ALREADY, believe tt this past 3 days, my right leg got stronger... was hopping to 'walk' faster. thanks to the needle poking thing, accupun something, and the bandaging of my foot, yay now better :D

Losing the ability to walked on Monday night to Tuesday morning makes me realise how important it is to be just able to walk... Imagine one day you cant walk... the feeling is like... argh.

So i learned, to be realllyyyyy thankful that i can walk. tt i beared the pain in the middle of the night, took up courage to stand up on my feet, to hop up my stairs at home and bathe and get to the sinseh, braved thru the needle poking, and the pressing of the leg and then bandage and head to school. i didnt miss sch. :D

& thank you to all angels who prayed for me!
Jieying, Dorothy, Jasmin, Sarah and alll!!! :D

Actually i think my threshold for pain quite high... and it's quite good. It means i have higher capacity.

Was talking to Kitson and Eunice, we agree poly make us realise who we are even more.. and im glad to come to SP to know so much more about myself.

The ugly side, and the good side that changed from the ugly side.
In all.. really thankful..

As my load gets bigger again, the camps, the plannings, the projects....
Jesus, this year is going to be different. i will take a balance, and excel in all. unlike previous years, i serve and i serve and i forgot all about the ministry of being a student.

All of us are in this ministry as a student, to be placed in school to honour God there. Took me 2 years, 4 sem to understand this.. but not to late! Abba, i am going to honour you this sem... (:

Here we stand, unafraid of the future

Finally a day home.
& it's the 2nd day my foot is swollen.... Thinking of how to climb up "Er Mei Shan" tmr to school, makes me feel argh. idk. But long day tmr though..

Dk why my foot just got swollen all a sudden also. But yeah, healing will come.
CWBS TMR!

Had a great day w Boon Val Dor and Stan ytd. I miss hanging out w my friends...
Like really fruitful fellowship.

[edit]
Went to research on why my foot is hurting so badly..
Maybe its Achilles Tendonitis or maybe it's Haglund's Deformity... and both is not good at all. First time after so long... or maybe it's the first time, worse than spraining my ankle, that i can't even get up to walk. this feeling is really very bad, and i dont like it. it's worse than losing my voice, (cuz it's impt to a singer), but now... for a traveler like me, always going to the east and west, the ability to walk is more important..

i dont want an operation.. i only want my foot to be healed. but in God i trust...
I pray You come and heal my leg.. one touch from You, can do miracles... i promise to not hurt it anymore..
But i trust i You.. You are El Shaddai...

[/edited]

When I lost hope, You were there to remind me, this is the start

Watched 3 cartoon movies this 2 days..
"Beauty & the Beast", "Cinderella" and "Anastasia", and to be honest, Cinderella(1950)'s moral of the story is just meaningless.. To marry a rich guy that is Cinderella's dream. Maybe tt show didnt protray Cinderella as a humble person at all, tt's why i kinda dislike it. But oh well.. It's just cartoon.

Hahaha i just like shows w meanings behind it. But it's very objective though..

Life is a road
And I want to keep going
Love is a river
I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road
Now and forever
Wonderful journey


I'll be there
When the world stops turning
I'll be there
When the storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing
At the beginning with you

Life... My journey isn't over ;)

Aladdin now! teehee :P

Beauty and the Beast..

Pastor Kong shared a montage on Beauty and the Beast today..
Always loved the song above and i rmbed the last time i heard it was at Kelvin and Cynthia's wedding.

Just finished watching Beauty and the Beast w Jy.. and it's so touching.
Beauty is not on the surface, beauty is what lies within..

Every one wants a happy ending, but somehow we assume that in this world, no happy ending exist. Tt day i was watching Bedtime Story, there was this part where the main cast's sister was telling the main actor, "I'm not angry with you because you gave my kids junk food, but because you told them that in this world, there's no happy ending..."

Most of us stuck w this mentality since birth, but i'm breaking this.
There are Happy Endings! but... today new conclusion.

There are happy stories with true love, BUT there is no happy ending with true love..
Because true love is everlasting and last for eternity, so no ending to the story at all..
Love is enduring and never ever pass away.

Other than what this world is seeking for, the Eros love, i choose Phileo love too.
when eros love come, it comes. But now... I focus on His agape love.. and phileo love. (:
I Choose Love. (:

Your eyes makes the stars looks like it's not shining

Had a very weird dream the day before..
Not gonna say it here but yeah, i think i kinda know the meaning of it. Really love my dreams, but sometimes, too many dreams come and i forgot about the previous ones.

School's really awesome actually.. Seriously i find joy in heading to school, like everyday there's this motivation to go school early, and for now, i haven't been late for school yet. okay, when i add yet, it means i will be late, SO NOOOOO. I wont be late this sem, i wont be skipping school. I give whoever reading this the permission to slap me.

Virtual slap is okay too. haha. I love this motivation actually. Thank you Jesus!

Waiting for Eunice at school to do HRC stuff ltr... I need to do more things in school now. Chris Tai one of my lecturers for those who dk him, always tell me when i ask him "what about me"? then he will say, "You're smart, BUT LAZY." and then he will continue, You're lazy, cannot see anything. somehow he got his analysis on every of my coursemates, cept for a few like me. K, time to change this lazy habit.


Seems like everybody's got a price,
I wonder how they sleep at night..
When the sale comes first,
And the truth comes second,
Just stop, for a minute and
Smile!
Why is everybody so serious?!
Acting so damn mysterious,
You got your shades on your eyes.
And your heels so high
That you can't even have a good time

Like this song! Everything i this world is not about pricing and money... There's more to be. Don't put a price on me, cause there's more to this price you priced me.

importance

We don't always have to be in the spotlight all the time, or rather, try to be in one...
Poly years taught me to lay low. and it taught me well...
Let nature takes it's course... I don't need to try so hard to get something that's so unimportant.

Philippians 3:7-8 (NLT)
I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ

& so....
Things that used to be important to be, bye....
Things that are still important to me, i will treasure..
Things that are important to me but not seen yet, i will pursue.

& how would i know what are important.. Jesus, take the wheel...

most sincere person...

GOOD MORNING! :D

Woke up w this line today that even when I was bathing I was thinking about it... thank God actually cuz if it isn't for this loud line, I wouldnt wake up and will be late.

"If I cant even believe in the most sincere person in the wrld, I cant even save myself.."

And so ponder and then search the bible, thannk God for the app on phone.. And I found:

" For "Everyone who calls on the name of the LORD will be saved." But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? ..."

Call upon the name of the Lord and be save..
& first step, believe.. In the most sincere person on Earth.
I believe in Jesus..

Great day ahead! I believe! :D

Mountain climbing...

(dk why my pic cannot rotate but yeah...)

Sometimes it's not that you are on the wrong mountain...
It's just that you are overstaying on the mountain you already conquered.
Come down and arise to the next mountain...

Human Resource

It's HR's role to put the right people in the right seat in the right bus.

There are great days and there are bad days. There are challenging tasks and crappy ones. Through it all, I need to remain passionate about people because HR is all about people and without a passion for people, we will not be able to continue relentlessly to build a workplace where the workforce is engaged and energized.

Human Resource Online Article

I used to doubt if i am in the wrong course, but really, i have to admit and know that this is the course He wants me to be in.... The place where i have to grow in.

The place where i need to love people...
Because in the end, they are actually all like me... Just tt everyone have different kind of fear, but we all need someone to fill our emptiness..

I am at the right place, but i need to be right... the right attitude, mentality and at the end of the journey, get the best out of it...

in Your name, there is power..

On some mornings, days where you just feel like the day won't turn out well, and all you wanted was to stay on ur bed to aviod all the bad things..

Almost everyone in this world would understand the feeling of it, but somedays not so bad that you can handle it, & some days you decided to give in and be a grumpy kid feeling grumpy everywhere u go.

On these kind of days... I wanna choose LOVE.

Just like how Jesus knew the day He was going to be betrayed was turning out bad, He chose not to fight back. He chose to go w the day and died on the cross glamourously.. W a good attitude.

One more day to Jesus Resurrection on Easter Sunday. Its not just about eggs, but after tt very day, we are so sure, there is power in the name of Jesus..

XOXO XINYING

Good Friday

what caught me today:

“O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”

Not mine, but Yours.
I choose love. I choose You.

Rough road, setbacks, stepping out of comfort zone..
All part of cross-bearing, He did it, and so can I.

Weird dream & Knowing...

Just the day before, I had this super weird dream... I was walking on the ground level, someone wanted me to get something from someone.

I went into the lift, saw 3 buttons (something, 2a, 2b?). The place was very quiet, and I was the only one there. Took the lift up, was so tired... I reached the top storey.. The place was so big! I look around, while looking at the empty big big room and suddenly I fell to the ground. Idk why but I heard or said, Expo is empty...

Some voice said, "Hey are you alright?"N stretched out His hands and wanted to pull me up. I couldn't see His face.. & I fainted.... Then I woke up and prepared for school.
-----------
What a weird dream. Okay I have been having weird dreams since idk when. Really be cool if the dreams have some interpretation or meaning, and I'm able to know them..

Hanged out w Deanna, Fiona, Gracew, Graced, Reyna yesterday. Really reminds me how much I missed them. Days we grew up tgt, hanging out tgt. They were there during the days I was feeling the down period of my life. & amazing thing is, despite of me being in SP and my idk why I am so busy schedule, I still get to hang out and they still love me. 7 to 13 years of friendship, I really treasure you girls! :D & I love you gals reallyyy so much! Despite meeting only once in a while.. :(

Friends like this, hard to get.. But up to us esp me to keep it close.

Was thinking aft taking train w sissy just now, the more I get closer to her, the more I know her.. Its true for every relationships.. I want to know I got to get closer, and when I want to get closer, it only means my love for her is that much of how much I want to know of her..

The longer you are & think you know a person, you tend to overstep boundaries sometimes. But the truth is if you truly know someone, you will be very sensitive to that person's boundaries where you can step in or out. This is the kind of person who knows how to press in someone's life. Step by step, slowly but surely. Well, so much to learn..

K I'm not late today! School time to 1pm and movie w another 2 dear gals in my life! :D

XOXO XINYING

We Cry out

So we cry on Your name, El Shaddai, God of grace

Lord most High, Jesus Christ

We rely on your grace, Adonai crowned in praise,

Lord most High, Jesus Christ

Jesus, Jesus

We cry out Your name, we cry out, cry it out

Abba Father, Adonai, El Shaddai

You Lord, our God

The different names of the Lord means different characteristics, but all in all, He is only ONE God that i will worship. The One, that in His presence, i get to genosko(sp) Him. Know Him by experience.. & in His presence there is so much more... (:

You are God

Had a very long yet fruitful day yesterday..
Ended at 1pm and I decided to head to church to sleep cuz that's like the most peaceful place and I won't get chased out, BUT I ended up talking to a SOT international student.. Her hunger, her faith to trust and everything. She said she came because she wanted to know God for herself. Young in faith yet bold to step out oto Singapore.. Felt so led to do something and I did. Praying its right. (:

I am so going SOT next year, *CONFESSING*

Then fail attempt of sleeping, I went to find Jieying. Always something different when I hang out w leaders esp my leader. Always something to catch.

Headed to Lynn's place for LM, and it was moving in the spirit. & I am truly very blessed by eileen. Still so comforted by what she said, I am not alone, let xy not forget there's friends loving and praying for her. Thank you Eileen.. I am really bless! (:

Holy Spirit moves.. Freely you receive, freely you give..
Likewise, freely you give, freely you receive.
In what measure? Freely.. Free!
You start giving when you receive, you start receiving when you give.

School actually starts at 2pm today but I'm heading to sch early to do HRC stuff. Haven't broke my late thingy yet! Keep it up xy! This sem is going to be different! I am gonna be a different xy in class! Kampatei!

K long post. But no worries. This blog is undercover. No one knows I'm back cept for jasmin & I guess a few? Fear not, ytd was a fruitful day thus the long post. Normal days will be cept to a 100 words summary if not my spastics will say this blog is a bible again! LOL.

Good day ahead, Good friday and easter this week.
Thank you Jesus for dying for me, breaking all my bondages and sickness! You are good!